Moving

So I'm moving probably tomorrow. Two hours away from where I live now. I know in reality that's not that far because I'm still in state and somewhat close, but it's too far for me. I hate being so depressing and sad on my blog, but I am sick of being fake and I feel I can be real here. I really really don't want to move. It literally sucks. The only problem is, it's the right thing to do. I am just really going to miss all of my friends. It also is going to be hard not really knowing anyone. That is scary. I will try and make the best of everything though. It should also be fun. I am kind of excited to meet new people, and also to try and start a new life. I hope everything works out.

Questions

Why does everything happen the way it does?
Why do I like to get hurt so much?
Why do people like to hurt me so much?
What is the point?
Why do I love someone who hurts me so much with all of my heart?
Why can I not just let him go??
Why me?
Why do I have to get so attatched to people when everytime I do I get hurt?
Why don't I learn?
When will it end?
Would the best solution be the final solution? The solution to end all solutions?
Why does everyone I love seem to leave me in the end?
When will I be happy??

Purple Nail Polish

Haha :) So I just got this cool new purple nail polish today :D I am so excited! It is crazy. When I opened it I thought it would smell like grapes. I have no idea why, because it's not supposed to. I felt stupid. It is the coolest color ever though.

The coolest thing though is that a stupid little bottle of nail polish put me in such a good mood. For some reason I am so happy. Maybe it's because my mom got it for me even though she shouldn't have. Maybe it's because it makes me feel pretty. Or maybe it's just because I am a girl, enough said. Haha I don't know what it is, but I sure am happy.

Guitar

So I've always wanted to learn guitar right? Well, I think I am starting to get a little obsessed with the idea haha. I got a guitar I think about two years ago, but I have not had the time or patience yet to actually sit down and play it. I am getting really close to that point though, by the end of the summer my goal is to be able to play somewhat good.

I have tried to start learning how to play before... it never works out though. I get those nasty callouses on the tips of my fingers that really hurt. And then the tips of my fingers are really sore for a week. I also try to play music that is too hard for me, so the next time I try learning I am going to try with easier music. So far though I keep running into roadbumps.

I really do think that I am starting to get a little obsessed with the idea though. Last night I had a dream that John Mayer (my guitar hero) decided for some random reason that he wanted to teach me how to play the guitar. I was so so psyched! He is my favorite chill music musician, and is actually my favorite musician. But enough about John Mayer.

I want to be a musician when I grow up. I was T.A.ing in choir today, and the teacher had me kind of judicate their songs. I had fun. I really want to learn how to play guitar though so that I can sing and play guitar.

One of my really good friends decided that she also wants to learn to play guitar, and then we decided we would play together! I am pretty excited about.

Hopefully it all works out. :)

Goldfish

I have been wondering for a long time, why do Goldfish (crackers) smile when they know you are going to be eaten?? They are my favorite snack other, but they really confuse me. It's like they are saying, "I am happy you are eating me, my life is going to be over and your hunger will be satisfied." I guess that is a good thing though. People probably wouldn't want to eat them if they were frowning. I don't know if I would want to eat depressed little fishies. I think they should just be faceless. Their other problem is that they are addictive.... I honestly will start eating them and not realise how much I have eaten of them until I notice the bag is noticeably lighter. It's kinda depressing. Hahaha oh well I guess. I can't deny the yummy deliciousness....

To Whom It May Concern

I don't know if you care about the reason I decided to start a blog, but I thought I would write it just in case you were interested. (and I've really been wanting to write "to whom it may concern" haha)

So I've been wanting to start a blog for a long time, I just haven't gotten around to it. Finally though I am going to do this. I want to be able to say what I feel like saying in hopes that someone may read it. That maybe someone who is in need of a laugh will find something I say funny. Or that I will be able to lift the spirit of someone who is feeling just a bit down, even if it's just a little bit. Or that someone who feels a lone will be able to feel like someone else is out there who understands.

I am a normal teenager going through normal teenage problems. I have daily battles that I have to fight. Sometimes I come out triumphant, but a lot of times I don't. Hopefully what I am going through now, will help someone else.

It may seem like a weird cause but I hope it works.

I'll post often :)